First, I want to say 'Welcome Back to the World Me'! We had a rough Christmas and New Years. I had a miscarriage when I was about 10/11 weeks along - it was three days before Christmas. It was hard for me. However, it did launch me into a series of great goals that I got to start working on in January. They weren't really New Years Resolutions because they weren't really spurred on by the beginning of the year. They were really born out of a way for me to handle my
grief (I realize I didn't lose a child or anything, but there was a grieving process none the less).
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| This picture is a fav of mine from when we did family pics in November. It makes me look deceptively thin. |
Anyway, as I found out I was the heaviest I have ever been (including my pregnancy) I decided it was time I started working out. I have not lost fantastic amounts of weight yet or anything. But, I did go running today. It was today that I remembered how beneficial sheer exhaustion can be.
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| Yeah, he is totally adorable |
I am not in great shape (heaviest of my life). In my run/walk I had to run up a hill that I hated even when I ran 3 miles a day. I was exhausted. It reminded me of when I was in track in high school. I had no business being in track. I can't run, jump or throw. So every practice was really just an exercise in how much my pride could take. Let's just say I am 5'4" and I was in high jump. I was not really destined for success there. However, I ran hard Every. Single. Day. Today as I ran up the hill, my thought process went "here we go, crappy hill . . . It's a party in the USA . . . whoo, this is hard! . . . one step. . . one step . . . one step. . ." My point being that eventually I stopped thinking and instead felt like it was sheer force of will driving me up that hill. It was glorious, and I feel like I conquered that voice inside saying I Can't. For Today.
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| This is how I spend most of my day. This very position. It wreaks havoc on my arms. |
Good Book to Read:
The Book of Three by Lloyd Alexander A fantastic author and a fantastic book. My mom introduced me to this series. Full of Welsh lore, but still a totally original fantasy for lovers of the juvenile/ya fantasty genre.
Oh honey, I'm so sorry to hear you went through that. You did lose something, and it's worth grieving over! I wish I could give you a hug. I think you're amazing!! Keep at it :D
ReplyDeleteLove your family pictures and way to go on your New Years goals! So sorry to hear about your miscarriage, that is a difficult loss but I am glad that you have found ways to process and work through the grief. I bet 2014 will bring you lots of good stuff!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss, Katie. My heart hurts for you and your family. Love you!
ReplyDeleteP.S. You still can make me laugh the way no one can. My favorite line, ""here we go, crappy hill . . . It's a party in the USA . . . whoo, this is hard!" Probably because that's what is going through my head every time I run too.